Eyes lifted upwards towards the layers of limestone with all its cracks and crevices. How could one possibly navigate this mountain of uncertainty? With only one glance behind I see the lovely green grass of yesterday. Playful flowers and the sounds of joyful birds creating a melodious chorus of ease and pleasure.
For now, that is behind me. This mountain is what life is requiring of me now. This ugly cliff is what demands my all. So I turn, I look upwards and begin this journey. What shall be my discoveries?
Strength, hope and love should be those things I desire most. Oh that I might have the strength to enter this battle. "For you have encircled me with strength for the battle; you have forced those who rose up against me to bow down." I will cling to your strength when mine runs dry. I will embrace the power and might of the Almighty when I am forced beyond my strength.
I've managed only a short distance up this mountain. There along the wall of cliffs and rock is a small pace to sit. I take the opportunity to prop myself up on this small ledge to organize my thoughts and check my supplies for the rest of the journey. At first nothing could be seen through the gray murk. Maybe it was the sound of hooves pounding the earth that allowed my eyes to pierce through the haze. Not too far off the base of the mountain were the most beautiful prancing ponies with their manes flying and legs lifting all together as if there existed the same melody flowing from mane to mane, hoof to hoof. Their eyes are so bright and happy and with such promise. I know them, just yesterday I was a part of them. Just yesterday I pranced alongside them in joyful frolic. The small clearing that provided this moment of memory closed up and once again I was surrounded in thick gray clouds with nothing but my determined will to live!
Thankful for the reminder, I packed away the memory next to my other supplies and continued on this journey. The further I traveled the cliffs were steeper and sharper now. Scrapes and bruises were clear battle scars as I continued this ascent. Noticeably weaker my body is in argument with the determination of my mind. I dig deep inside my supply bag. I need something to force my body to take the next step forward. For this I have to dig deeper, deep inside the bag, way back into the furthest corners of my memory where faith begins. For this portion of the journey it is the truths of those whose blood exists within me, whose strength and faith are called upon. Their faith and hope are now mine. Gifted to me over the decades for this exact moment. That precious sampling of faith served them well and was packed away for me. It is mine, mine to cling to. Mine to embrace. Mine to believe in. This faith is my assurance and my hope.
Nearing the pinnacle, the air is so thin that my breath is faint. I expected a brutal journey but my youthful optimism would have never purchased this picture to describe the path. This one is much darker, much harder than expected. Surprisingly stuffed in a crack almost to the top of the mountain was jubilation. Yes I know that it is hard to believe that on such a journey one can locate such a treasure. But this form of joy only comes through the faith, hope and love handed down from the Creator. When all other things are gone and lost I locate and accept the faith of my heritage.
It is at that very moment my weak hands pull my frail body to the top, the last step complete. Before forcing myself to stand I linger in the moment where my body can rest. A moment of peace, pure serenity surrounds my being. Everything is total silence.
There is no rush. I linger in this tranquil moment of peace. I begin to take note of my senses. I do not feel pain. The battle wounds to complete the journey are healed. In the distance I am hearing the little birdies and their delight at life. Upon opening my eyes the clouds are gently moving across a gloriously blue sky. I can smell the grass and herbs that surround my body. Every sense is awakened. With all senses accounted for I stand to my feet. It is then my eyes can take in my new surroundings. But there was something new, something unexpected.
Little wisps of light fluttering around me. These little fireflies are now part of me, I am part of the Light because the Light lives within me. Without notice my arms are above my head, eyes searching the sky for the source of this jubilation. My heart is overwhelmed. My body is no longer in battle but now in exaltation to the Savior. In one thought I realized, He carried me. He gave me strength through that ancestral gift of faith and hope. He is my source of Joy and Jubilation. It flows from me without warning. "Do not fear, for I have redeemed you and called you by name, You are mine!"
A new journey begins.... now with a new light and passion dwelling deep within.
"Then your light will break forth like the dawn, and your healing will come quickly. Your righteousness will go before you, and the glory of the LORD will be your rear guard."
Isaiah 58:8
Scripture references:
Psalms 18:39
Isaiah 43:1
Dedicated to a special person in my life fighting a difficult diagnosis.
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